11 Songs About Different Amounts of Time, From Shortest to Longest, Part One
written by Sam Greenspan

Sometimes I have no idea where these ideas come from. For this list, I decided to find 11 songs whose titles refer to different amounts of time, and order them from shortest to longest.

This is part one; part two will be posted tomorrow. If the concept isn't clear yet... it will be soon enough...

1. The answers ARE all up to me!

   "One Moment in Time" by Whitney Houston. Webster's defines "moment" as "a minute portion or point of time." That's relatively undefined, but even shorter than a second. And it beats out Kelly Clarkson's "A Moment Like This" because... well, because Whitney's song popped into my head first, so that has to mean something.
   
   
2. "Seconds" by U2. I don't like U2, but this was the most recognizable song I could find that discussed seconds.
   
   
3. "One Minute Man" by Missy Elliott. This beat out "New York Minute" by The Eagles because it's slightly more specific, although, in theory, a New York minute is less than 60 seconds because New Yorkers move so quickly. Or something. I'm going with Missy's song because of the fantastic Jay-Z rap in the middle.
   
   
4. "4 Minutes (To Save the World)" by Madonna. Not even MacGuyver could save the world that quickly.
   
   

5. Some call Cage's 4'33" musical brilliance. Others call it the equivalent of a conceptual artist putting a jar of feces on display in an exhibit.

   "4'33"" by John Cage. Intro To Music 101 shoutout! It's all silence! Isn't that artistic!
   
   
6. "30 Minutes" by t.A.T.u. Katy Perry has grabbed the faux-lesbian-for-attention title from t.A.T.u., but their music still lives on here.
   
   
7. "Hour For Magic" by Jim Morrison. Wanna hear some vintage Jim Morrison lunacy? This "song" is him reading a bad poem over a psychedelic riff. Which somehow makes one minute and 20 seconds FEEL like an hour.
   
   
8. "Afternoon Delight" by Starland Vocal Band. This is earlier on the list than the next two songs because it only refers to the afternoon, which is a mere five hour period. (And that's not even taking into account if the afternoon delight is with Missy Elliott's guy described above.)
   
   
9. "Morning Train (9 to 5)" by Sheena Easton. The title refers to the morning AND to the nine to five workday, which is why it gets preferential treatment over Dolly Parton's "9 to 5".
   
   

10. Hey, Jambo Jambo!

    "All Night Long (All Night)" by Lionel Richie. I don't know how long ALL NIGHT is to '80s Lionel, but I bet it's longer than Starland Vocal Band's five hour afternoon or Sheena Easton's eight hour workday. When's the last time you went to a karamu or fiesta that lasted less than eight hours. Hopefully never, unless it was the shittiest karamu ever.
    
    
11. "Night and Day" by Frank Sinatra. Frank isn't that into afternoons (I'm sure he once told a whole slew of dames, "I do my best sleepin' when the sun's shinin', love"), but here, he claims both night AND day.
    
    

Stop by tomorrow when I'll keep going from here into days, weeks, months, years and beyond. Is this my dumbest concept list ever? We will see...

This list was originally published on Tuesday, January 27, 2009 at 12:01:00 AM under the category Music.
It currently has View Comments.

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